Current Reviews - Sobriety Test Movie Reviews

REVIEW: In Free Birds, the Pardoned Great Turkey Would Seriously Like Us to Eat Pizza for Thanksgiving

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, November 2, 2013 In : 0.12% Hard Liquor

Free Birds

Directed By: Jimmy Hayward

Starring: Owen Wilson, Woody Harrelson, and Amy Poehler

It's the holiday movie season, which means we're going to get some great blockbusters, the next batch of awards contenders, and some horrible seasonally-themed family flicks. This weekend, we're getting a little bit of everything. We've possibly got the next big sci-fi series with Ender's Game. We've got the steamy film that took top honors at Cannes earlier this year, Blue is the Warmest Color. We'...
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REVIEW: For the Flatbush Four in Last Vegas, No One Calls Them Names, Like a Movie That Sucks, Except Us

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, November 2, 2013 In : 0.09% Cocktails

Last Vegas

Directed By: Jon Turteltaub

Starring: Michael Douglas, Robert De Niro, Kevin Kline, and Morgan Freeman

Hollywood has a tendency to milk every drop out of whatever idea that’s become their latest cash cow. Take The Hangover's wild bachelor party concept for instance. Because of Hollywood's insistence on sacrificing originality for profitability, I have a love-hate relationship with the Wolf Pack. I love the original Hangover movie and hate parts 2 and 3. With this in mind, it sho...
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REVIEW: With Its Secret Formula for Happiness, About Time Takes Us on a Remarkably Fun Ride Through Tim's Extraordinary Ordinary Life

Posted by James Brown on Friday, November 1, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

About Time

Directed By: Richard Curtis

Starring: Domhnall Gleeson, Rachel McAdams, Bill Nighy, Tom Hollander, and Margot Robbie

A couple of months ago, I said that the age of romantic comedies was over. As the fall season has demonstrated, I might have to retract my statement. Since then, we've seen British rom com I Give It a Year. We came back stateside last month with the charming indie Enough Said starring Julia Louis-Dreyfus and the late James Gandolfini. Now, we're headed back across t...
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REVIEW: Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa – Irving Zisman And His Grandson Billy Invade Vending Machines, Strip Clubs, Funeral Homes, Parks and Weddings As They Make Their Way Across The Country

Posted by SoberFilmChick on Sunday, October 27, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa
SoberFilmChick

Directed By: Jeff Tremaine

Starring: Johnny Knoxville, Jackson Nicoll, and Georgina Cates

I must confess that I have never seen a Jackass movie before. While I have seen Johnny Knoxville and his cohorts on MTV, I never actually spent money or time on a feature length film. I was pleasantly surprised by Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa. The film, though crass and certainly appealing to the lowest common denominator, is quite amusing. Moreover, if ...

REVIEW: All Is Lost for the Virginia Jean and Her Crafty Captain Robert Redford

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, October 26, 2013 In : 0.00% Water

All Is Lost

Directed By: J.C. Chandor

Starring: Robert Redford

In the 2012 awards season, veteran directors stepped up to the plate. We saw the likes of Steven Spielberg, Quentin Tarantino, Kathryn Bigelow, and Ang Lee rising to the occasion and putting out great movies. To some extent, the opposite is happening this year. For instance, first-time director Ryan Coogler has got plenty of Oscar buzz for his poignant drama Fruitvale Station. The same can be said for director Steve McQueen, who ...
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REVIEW: #HaveYouBeenBad? For All Its Drugs, Diamonds, & Cheetahs, The Counselor Strangely Doesn't Fit the Bill

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, October 26, 2013 In : 0.12% Hard Liquor

The Counselor

Directed By: Ridley Scott

Starring: Michael Fassbender, Penélope Cruz, Cameron Diaz, Javier Bardem, and Brad Pitt

Some movies seem like the perfect recipe for success on paper but unexpectedly turn out to be failures on the grandest of scales. Until today, the best example in recent memory was the 2007 thriller Lions for Lambs. The film starred Tom Cruise, Meryl Streep, and Robert Redford. To top things off, Redford was playing multiple roles by sitting in the director's chair ...
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REVIEW: Carrie – Margaret And Carrie White Are A Terrifying Mother And Daughter Pair In This Remake Of A Stephen King Classic

Posted by SoberFilmChick on Sunday, October 20, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

Carrie
SoberfilmChick

Directed by: Kimberly Peirce

Starring: Chloe Grace Moretz, Julianne Moore, Judy Greer, Gabriella Wilde

Generally, I am not a fan of remakes because they usually end up being a less interesting copycat of an original concept. The story of Carrie, in particular, has been told numerous times via Stephen King’s novel and multiple film and theatrical adaptations. However, with Boys Don’t Cry director Kimberly Peirce at the helm, this Carrie adaptation shines on its own. ...

REVIEW: Julian Assange May Have Hundreds of Volunteers in The Fifth Estate, But They Don't Get the Information Revolution Started Right

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, October 19, 2013 In : 0.09% Cocktails

The Fifth Estate

Directed By: Bill Condon

Starring: Benedict Cumberbatch, Daniel Brühl, Anthony Mackie, David Thewlis, Alicia Vikander, Stanley Tucci, and Laura Linney

As the media unanimously covered the GOP's shutdown of the federal government and their manufactured debt ceiling crisis, some news fell through the cracks this week. Recently, a judge in New York approved the NSA's continued bulk collection of Americans' call logs, something to which I would imagine most Americans are vehementl...
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REVIEW: 12 Years a Slave, Solomon Northrup Brilliantly Plays the Fiddle as Georgia Runaway Platt to Survive Until Freedom is Opportunity

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, October 19, 2013 In : 0.00% Water

12 Years a Slave

Directed By: Steve McQueen

Starring: Chiwetel Ejiofor, Michael Fassbender, Benedict Cumberbatch, Paul Dano, Paul Giamatti, Lupita Nyong'o, Sarah Paulson, Brad Pitt, Alfre Woodard, Quvenzhané Wallis, Dwight Henry, and Adepero Oduye

In a review two months ago, I wrote about how filmmakers are taking us to school this year. With films like Fruitvale Station, Lee Daniels' The Butler, and even 42, we've gotten a healthy dose of black history from Hollywood. We've arrived at our fi...
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REVIEW: Machete Kills – Machete Don’t Tweet, But He Slaughters Everything Else, Including Any Entertainment Value in This Grindhouse Movie Gone Wrong

Posted by SoberFilmChick on Sunday, October 13, 2013 In : 0.12% Hard Liquor

Machete Kills

Directed By: Robert Rodriguez

Starring: Danny Trejo, Michelle Rodriguez, Sofia Vergara, Amber Heard, Lady Gaga, Antonio Banderas, Cuba Gooding, Jr., Walton Goggins, William Sadler, Demián Bichir, Mel Gibson, and Jessica Alba

Machete Kills is the sequel to the 2010 cult hit Machete. Unfortunately, Machete Kills fails to deliver the fast-paced, brutal fun of the original film. In fact, Machete Kills is so bad, that patrons actually walked out of my theater in the middle of the fi...
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