Current Reviews - Sobriety Test Movie Reviews

REVIEW: In The East, Preventing Eco-Terrorist Jams Proves to Be a Challenge for Hiller Brood Operative Sarah Moss

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, June 8, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

The East

Directed By: Zal Batmanglij

Starring: Brit Marling, Alexander Skarsgård, Ellen Page, Toby Kebbell, Shiloh Fernandez, Julia Ormond, Patricia Clarkson, and Jason Ritter

"We are the East. We don’t care how rich you are. We want all those who are guilty to experience the terror of their crime. It’s easy when it’s not your life. Easy when it’s not your home. But when it’s your fault, it shouldn’t be so easy to sleep at night — especially when we know where you live. Lie ...
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REVIEW: The Kings Of Summer – Joe, Patrick And Biaggio Brave The Forest And Boston Market In This Endearing Coming Of Age Story

Posted by SoberFilmChick on Saturday, June 8, 2013 In : 0.03% Wine Coolers

The Kings Of Summer
SoberFilmChick

Directed by: Jordan Vogt-Roberts

Starring: Nick Offerman, Nick Robinson, Gabriel Basso, Moises Arias, Megan Mullally, and Alison Brie

When I saw the trailer for The Kings of Summer, I was sold. Not because I was excited about another suburban coming of age story, but because Nick Offerman is in the film. I love Offerman as Ron Swanson on Parks and Recreation and I even enjoy when he reads tweets from young female celebrities on Conan. With his dry delive...

REVIEW: Blessed Be the New Founding Fathers of America, a Nation Reborn With One Big Moral Dilemma Called The Purge

Posted by James Brown on Friday, June 7, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

The Purge

Directed By: James DeMonaco

Starring: Ethan Hawke, Lena Headey, Adelaide Kane, and Max Burkholder

America is the poster child for gun-loving nations across the globe. I'm not going to delve too deep into the divisive, often illogical misconceptions that are floating around the web about whether or not we should arm ourselves to death, but I can't deny that this has been a hot button issue this year. What I will delve into are the many, many victims of gun violence and some of the mal...
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REVIEW: Before Midnight, Take a Time Machine Back to Six Lovely Weeks in the Peloponnesian Islands

Posted by James Brown on Sunday, June 2, 2013 In : 0.03% Wine Coolers

Before Midnight

Directed By: Richard Linklater

Starring: Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy

Unlike Hollywood movies, it's very rare that an indie film gets a sequel. With the exception of some sick horror films, this just doesn't happen too often. You won't see Midnight in Paris Deux, 1000 Days of Summer, or Moonrise Kingdom 2. Even when they generate big profits, they're not coming back to theaters again. The exception to this rule is the Before series from Richard Linklater. First, there was Bef...
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REVIEW: Stuck in a Blender But Now Saving Lives, Billy and Nick Get Us Psyched for One Hilarious Google Internship and a Vicious Quidditch Match

Posted by James Brown on Sunday, June 2, 2013 In : 0.03% Wine Coolers

The Internship

Directed By: Shawn Levy

Starring: Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson, Rose Byrne, Max Minghella, JoAnna Garcia, John Goodman, Josh Brener, Tobit Raphael, Dylan O'Brien, Tiya Sircar, Aasif Mandvi, and Will Ferrell

If The Hangover Part III proved anything, it proved that it's time for the Wolfpack to step aside. With this in mind, I have some good news. The Frat Pack is back! Later this year, Vince Vaughn will be starring in The Delivery Man, an English language remake of the Canadian com...
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REVIEW: In Now You See Me, the Four Horsemen Employ the Targeted Deception and Misdirection of Magic for the Eye and for Shrike

Posted by James Brown on Friday, May 31, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

Now You See Me

Directed By: Louis Leterrier

Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Mark Ruffalo, Woody Harrelson, Mélanie Laurent, Isla Fisher, Dave Franco, Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, and Common

"Come in close, because the more you think you see, the easier it'll be to fool you."
-J. Daniel Atlas (Jesse Eisenberg)

Everyone loves a good magic trick. It's the stuff that makes you put faith in the impossible, the inexplicable. It's just hard to translate the awe and wonder of magic to the big screen. Jus...
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REVIEW: Father-Son Sci-Fi Flick After Earth Does a Little Too Much Ghosting Because of the Fear Factor Named Ursa

Posted by James Brown on Friday, May 31, 2013 In : 0.09% Cocktails

After Earth

Directed By: M. Night Shyamalan

Starring: Jaden Smith, Will Smith, Isabelle Fuhrman, Sophie Okonedo, Zoë Isabella Kravitz, and David Denman

"Fear is not real. It is a product of thoughts you create…Now do not misunderstand me, danger is very real. But fear is a choice."
-General Cypher Raige, Prime Commander (Will Smith)

In all the advertisements for After Earth over the course of 2013, one major credit has been noticeably missing, the director. The marketing efforts heavily focuse...
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REVIEW: Ahoy Sexy! Frances Ha is Definitely Undateable With All Her Wild Antics That Aren't Really Antics

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, May 25, 2013 In : 0.03% Wine Coolers

Frances Ha

Directed By: Noah Baumbach

Starring: Greta Gerwig, Mickey Sumner, Adam Driver, and Grace Gummer

Greta Gerwig has had a long, hard road to success on the big screen. Frances Ha doesn't mark her first leading role. We've seen her lead the pack for somewhat underwhelming films like Damsels in Distress and Lola Versus. She hasn't had that breakout role yet, that performance that leaves an indelible mark on movie-goers. Frances Ha might just be that role. We'll just have to wait and s...
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REVIEW: The Epic Clash Between Leafmen & Boggans Over a Pod Proves That There Are Many Leaves But One Tree...Plus a Couple of Stompers

Posted by James Brown on Friday, May 24, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

Epic

Directed By: Chris Wedge

Starring: Amanda Seyfried, Colin Farrell, Beyoncé Knowles, Josh Hutcherson, Christoph Waltz, Aziz Ansari, Chris O'Dowd, Pitbull, Jason Sudeikis, and Steven Tyler

Is it me or are animated films more violent these days? I'm going to date myself by saying this, but I grew up during the Second Golden Age of Disney with movies like Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, and The Lion King. I grew up when films were told with a song and dance, not a sword and shield. Just look...
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REVIEW: When It Comes to Toretto's Family Code Versus Shaw's Precision in Fast & Furious 6, the Samoan Thor Luke Hobbs Steals the Show

Posted by James Brown on Friday, May 24, 2013 In : 0.06% Beer or Wine

Fast & Furious 6

Directed By: Justin Lin

Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Michelle Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster, Tyrese Gibson, Chris "Ludacris" Bridges, Sung Kang, Luke Evans, Gina Carano, Gal Gadot, Elsa Pataky, and John Ortiz

It's official. I'm convinced that the Fast & Furious films are the 007 flicks of our time. I'm not talking about Daniel Craig, the James Bond we know and love today. I'm talking about the old days with Sean Connery, the master British spy o...
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