Showing Tag: " teen" (Show all posts)

REVIEW: In Sixteen Candles, There's Nothing Sweet About Sam's Sixteenth Birthday

Posted by James Brown on Thursday, January 3, 2013, In : 0.03% Wine Coolers 

Sixteen Candles





Directed By: John Hughes

Starring: Molly Ringwald, Paul Dooley, Justin Henry, and Anthony Michael Hall

There's nothing quite like an 80’s teen flick, especially one directed by the late great John Hughes.  His coming-of-age comedies are timeless depictions of what it means to be a teenager — the personal stresses, the social anxieties, and the constant feeling of being misunderstood.  They also capture the good stuff — the crazy nights at some friend's house, those fun ...


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REVIEW: The Cold Ones and the Spirit Warriors Leave a Lot to Be Desired. Nobody Will Imprint on Eclipse

Posted by James Brown on Thursday, November 15, 2012, In : 0.12% Hard Liquor 

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse





Directed By: David Slade

Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Bryce Dallas Howard, Billy Burke, and Dakota Fanning

Watching a Twilight sequel is like watching a game of limbo.  As the acting, writing, and directing continue to spiral downward, it's all about how low these teen movies can go.  I have to give it to our trio of stars on their limbo skills.  Every time I think, they can't go any lower, they somehow manage to make the romance a l...


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REVIEW: In New Moon, the Hole in Bella's Chest is Unpoetic and Uninspiring Altogether

Posted by James Brown on Tuesday, November 13, 2012, In : 0.12% Hard Liquor 

The Twilight Saga: New Moon





Directed By: Chris Weitz

Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Ashley Greene, Rachelle Lefevre, Billy Burke, Michael Sheen, and Dakota Fanning

"Sometimes you've gotta learn to love what's good for you."
-Charlie Swan (Billy Burke)

That's the wisest thing I've ever heard out of a Twilight movie.  More often than not, however, many of us still love what's not good for us.  Take the Twilight films for example.  They're full of horrendous acting...


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REVIEW: The Breakfast Club Brings Together a Brain, an Athlete, a Basket Case, a Princess, and a Criminal for the Best Detention Ever

Posted by James Brown on Tuesday, October 30, 2012, In : 0.00% Water 

The Breakfast Club





Directed By: John Hughes

Starring: Emilio Estevez, Molly Ringwald, Judd Nelson, Anthony Michael Hall, Ally Sheedy, and Paul Gleason

"Don't mess with the bull young man.  You'll get the horns."
-Assistant Principal Richard Vernon (Paul Gleason)

The Breakfast Club has been resurrected as of late.  I've seen it on cable quite a bit.  It's just been released on Blu-ray.  It got some serious love in the recent comedy Pitch Perfect.  It has even been invoked as a comparison poin...


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REVIEW: Step Up 3D Adds a New Dimension to Crappy Filmmaking

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, July 14, 2012, In : 0.12% Hard Liquor 
Step Up 3D





Directed By: Jon Chu

Starring: Rick Malambri, Adam Sevani, Sharni Vinson, and Alyson Stoner

"I dance because dance can change things.  One move can set a whole generation free like Elvis.  One move can make you believe like there's something more...and some moves can give a skinny, curly-haired kid, that just wants to dance, some hope."
-Moose (Adam Sevani)


Dance may give Moose hope, but I've lost all hope for the Step Up franchise. As I continue this retro series, director Jon Chu keep...
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REVIEW: Step Up 2 Takes It to the Streets As It Takes the Series to New Lows

Posted by James Brown on Saturday, July 14, 2012, In : 0.12% Hard Liquor 
Step Up 2: The Streets





Directed By: Jon Chu

Starring: Briana Evigan, Robert Hoffman, Adam G. Sevani, Will Kemp, and Cassie

Bad movies making money breed more bad movies.  When I heard of Step Up 2: The Streets, I was less than enthused to say the least.  After all, Step Up was nothing more than a mediocre flick.  What good could come of another one of these pointless dance movies?  After having revisited Step Up 2, I've been reminded that I was right.  On the one positive note, the dancing in St...
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REVIEW: Step Up Needs to Find Its Groove

Posted by James Brown on Tuesday, July 10, 2012, In : 0.09% Cocktails 
Step Up





Directed By: Anne Fletcher and Mico Heltborg

Starring: Channing Tatum, Jenna Dewan, Mario, Drew Sidora, Alyson Stoner, Rachel Griffiths, and Josh Henderson

Every time I begin to wonder why Hollywood keeps shoveling crap into theaters, I'm reminded that we keep buying it for some strange reason.  I can think of no better example than the Step Up movies.  By any measure, these films suck, but people keep buying tickets to see them for whatever reason.  Ultimately, our lack of good taste a...
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